The Emotional Side of Fatherhood: Learning to Express Love Openly
- Divya Pritwani
- Dec 21, 2025
- 17 min read
Table of contents
Introduction
As parents, we often find ourselves navigating a complex web of emotions, both our own and our children's. Today, let's talk about something deeply significant—the emotional journey of fatherhood. It’s easy to focus on providing for our families in practical ways, but what about the less tangible, yet equally vital, aspect of expressing love openly? Have you ever paused to consider how deeply your emotional expression, or lack thereof, impacts your relationship with your kids? It's a topic that resonates with me on a personal level, as I’ve learned that being emotionally available is a cornerstone of strong family bonds. This isn’t just about feeling emotions but understanding how to communicate them in ways that nurture and strengthen our relationships with our children.
Breaking free from traditional molds can be challenging, but it’s essential. Many of us grew up with the idea that fathers should be stoic and reserved, but children thrive on connection and authenticity. When we as fathers allow ourselves to be vulnerable and express our feelings openly, we’re teaching our children that it's okay for them to do the same. This vulnerability isn't a weakness; it's a strength. By embracing our emotions and sharing them with our kids, we create an environment where they feel safe and understood. Think about how powerful it is when your child sees you as a real person, with feelings just like theirs, rather than just a provider or authority figure. It creates a profound sense of trust and mutual respect.
In this blog, The Emotional Side of Fatherhood: Learning to Express Love Openly, we explore how the journey of emotional expression is more than just personal growth—it's about shaping a legacy of love and open communication within our families. When we commit to expressing our love openly, we not only enrich our relationships with our children but also equip them with the tools to build healthy relationships in their own lives.
Let’s explore together how to cultivate this emotional openness, discover new ways to connect with our kids, and ultimately, redefine what it means to be a loving, present father in today’s world. It's a journey worth taking, one that promises to bring deeper joy and connection to our lives and the lives of our children.
Let’s first see what embracing the emotional journey of fatherhood actually looks like.
Embracing the Emotional Journey of Fatherhood
Embracing the emotional journey of fatherhood means more than just showing up. It means challenging silent expectations we have inherited.
For many of us, the idea of being strong has been tied to suppressing feelings. But what if real strength lies in doing the opposite? What if it’s about learning to feel, express and connect?
“I’m feeling stressed in this situation, I’m somehow unable to deal with it alone, I need your support.”
This is a statement which I always want to express but some invisible conditioning stops me from doing so, and I continue to live with undue stress. After a continued period of stress and anxiety, I finally break down and the bottled up thoughts and emotions come out as a blabber. By then the situation has already gone out of control, thereby creating a ripple effect.
After noticing this lethal impact across all spheres of my life, for once I had attempted to embrace vulnerability and be open about my feelings with my partner and my children. When that finally happened, the situation magically eased out. I was able to relieve myself of the undue pressure that I was holding up and I got tremendous support from my family not only in facing the situation, but also in giving me some fresh perspective through their fresh eyes which helped me deal with the situation creatively. Having said that, it takes consistent practice to break/change old habits and patterns.
As I started learning the silence I was conditioned into, I realized that vulnerability isn’t something to fear but rather something to lean into. It didn’t help me just release pressure but opened doors to connection. Especially with my child, being honest about my imperfections brought unexpected moments of closeness. Let me share one such moment.
So most of the time while playing or doing activities with my family members, I succumb to the undue pressure of being perfect. Whether or not I have the skill to do that or any past experience in doing that, or I have seen someone perform that activity before, I still just stand there putting up a face of a grown up pretending that I already know it and I don’t need to learn or I’m not interested to learn that or I don’t want to learn that. This pretense just enhances the pressure.
When this pretence came to my notice, I was awestruck. The very next day while just sitting with my child I shared with him that I failed again. Failed again not having any expectations. Failed again in keeping up with my integrity. Though he had no direct connection to my sharing, just being vulnerable and open with him relieved a huge weight, and his simple “it’s okay” deepened our bond in an unexpected way.
Moments like this remind me that emotional expression isn’t just about one-time sharing; it’s about building a relationship with our inner world. But how can fathers become more attuned to their emotions as a tool for authentic parenting?
Well, the first step to this is recognising and acknowledging to yourself about the emotion that’s going on. For sure this ability to recognise or develop self awareness doesn’t come overnight. It takes its own time along with constant practice to develop this important ability to be aware of the inner feelings and emotions. Like they say, charity begins at home, self awareness begins with recognising one’s own emotions and accepting them.
And as we navigate through this journey of embracing emotional openness and vulnerability, there is a quiet force guiding it all—love. But what does fatherly love look like beyond the traditional roles that we’ve known? Well keep reading to see how presence, trust, and tenderness reshape our understanding of fatherly affection.
Love in Action — Redefining Fatherly Affection
Fatherly love has long been defined by provision, hard work, and practical support. But what if it didn’t have to stop there? What if love also looked like showing up with emotional presence? That brings us to a deeper question: What does it truly mean for a father to be emotionally present, not just physically or financially involved?
It means to stand strong with a smile despite all odds. Trusting the natural ability of the child to cope up with situations life throws. They say, your daughter should start walking by the age of 12 months. However even at the age of 15 months, she still uses support to walk. My mind covers me with doubts, whether we are parenting well. When I acknowledge those feelings as mere doubts out of influence of other’s opinion, I am able to free myself of the burden of my children following the set norms. Inculcating in myself, the ability to trust her own unique natural process of growth and accepting her journey with all the positive vibrations goes far beyond just holding her fingers and helping her move her legs.
Whenever I tickle my child by acting as a tickling monster, the energy just shifts. There are giggles all around and out of nowhere, oozes out love. The mood lightens up and the bond revives.
Whatever I speak, carry underlying with it some vibrations. Each word carries vibrations which are invisible. These vibrations go out to create a lasting impact. These vibrations originate from our thoughts, feelings, emotions. Positive thoughts and emotions create a positive impact. Negative thoughts and emotions create negative impact. It is of utmost importance to regulate these vibrations before speaking anything. For example, if I am feeling sad or upset, and utter ‘wow’ or ‘very good’ it is impossible to have the desired impact these words are intended for. Hence, in order to express love, the 1st step is to feel in love without any filters or boundaries, and then express your love through words.
When I am in an act of play, I am in love with myself. Love starts with loving oneself. When there is unfiltered love, there is intensity and there is a vibration of security that comes along. It is in the small day to day activities where the change begins. As they say, practice makes a man perfect. It is only with consistent practice that habits are formed. If one has to develop the habit of heartfelt communication, it has to be practiced everyday for the mind and body to get trained in it.
Love and affection doesn't stop at rituals, it grows with us. As we practice love through small, daily acts, something powerful begins to shift: we start evolving emotionally tight alongside our children. And this co-evolution is where the real magic begins, keep reading so I can explain.
Co-Evolving with Your Child Emotionally
Co-evolving is a journey, one where you and your child grow side by side together. Even when in different situations, one's growth could inspire the other, and the same goes for emotions. A father's willingness to express emotion could help teach children it’s safe to do the same.
Observation is the most effective way for children to learn. Parents are the ones they observe the most, especially up to age 8. They observe both actions and vibrations. When my child notices that I am expressing my ideas and emotions with ease, they start doing the same, slowly but steadily. When they observe or sense unease doing the same, they begin to suppress their own emotions. Children’s sensations are so high, they not only observe physical expressions, they can sense inner feelings, vibrations. Feeling unsafe to express emotions leads to insecurity in life overall.
But, here's a thing about co-evolving, as your child observes you, and learns from you, you can do the same. You can use this childlike way of learning from observing your child. In fact, fathers can discover a lot about themselves simply by observing their child’s raw, unfiltered emotional expressions.
I, as a father, surprisingly discovered and recollected my own expressions on similar situations during my childhood just by observing my son. It is the most profound way to reflect back on my own emotions, and discover my own childhood emotions. It gives me insights on releasing my own emotions in a manner which does not affect others negatively.
But this growth isn’t always peaceful, it often shows up in messy moments. As we learn from our children's honesty, we’re also challenged to meet the conflict with the same emotional openness. For many fathers, moments of conflict with their children can feel like failure.
Voices rise, emotions flare, and disconnection follows. But what if these moments held hidden potential—not just for discipline, but for deeper connection and emotional growth? Emotionally aware fathers understand that conflict is not something to avoid or suppress, but an opportunity to model emotional intelligence, build trust, and strengthen the parent-child bond.
Emotionally aware fathers have the power to turn moments of conflict into opportunities for deeper connection and growth. Instead of reacting impulsively, they pause, regulate their emotions, and respond with calm presence. They look beyond the behavior to understand the unmet needs driving it—such as a desire for attention, autonomy, or understanding—and respond with empathy. By validating their child’s emotions (“It’s okay to be upset—I’m here”), they create a sense of safety and trust. When they misstep, they take responsibility and repair the rupture, showing that strong relationships are built not on perfection, but on honesty and reconnection. After the moment has passed, they reflect together with their child, helping both to learn from the experience and build emotional awareness. In this way, emotionally aware fathers model resilience, teach emotional intelligence, and strengthen the parent-child bond—proving that conflict, handled with care, can be a powerful path to connection.
Emotionally aware fatherhood is not about perfection—it’s about presence. Every difficult moment is an invitation to deepen your relationship, to model emotional strength, and to teach your child that love isn’t about never falling—it’s about always coming back together.
And while emotional bonding deepens connection in difficult moments, not all bonding happens through conflict. Some of the most powerful emotional exchanges come through lightness, laughter, presence, and most of all, play. But can play really be more than just fun? What if it can be a father’s emotional language? Sounds interesting, right? Well, if yes, then read on.
The Role of Play in Emotional Expression
Play isn’t just a pastime—it's often the most natural doorway into emotional connection. While expressing feelings through words may feel unfamiliar, playing with a child can feel easy, instinctive, and full of joy. But beneath the surface of pretend battles and silly games lies something profound: play becomes a space where love, trust, and emotional safety grow.
For a child, play is a way of life, a language through which they express most organically and fully. While a child associates mothers with comfort, care, and calmness, he/she associates father as the 1st player, with whom the child can just play naturally. Giggles, laughters, running around, hopping around are the mediums which fathers use as bridges to build that connection with their children.
Shared play offers fathers a natural, joyful way to express affection and build emotional closeness with their children. Through play—whether it's building blocks, tossing a ball, or engaging in imaginative games—dads connect on their child’s level, creating a space where laughter, eye contact, and touch flow easily and authentically. These moments disarm emotional barriers and foster a sense of safety and belonging, often more effectively than verbal expressions of love. For fathers who may struggle with overt displays of affection, play becomes an emotional language—one that communicates care, attentiveness, and joy without needing many words. In this way, play isn't just fun—it's foundational to trust, attachment, and emotional attunement.
This is where creativity steps in to deepen the experience, because play, it doesn’t stop at physical fun, it opens the door to imagination, and imagination is what transforms play into something even richer: a safe channel for emotional release and bonding.
Imagination helps in stepping out of your role, and letting free the mind, thereby inducing ease in the system. Playing a role, that allows me to express the emotions that are flowing, without actually disturbing the inner state / peace. Role Plays are a part of our everyday routine, thereby improving on Communication. Laughing randomly on the silliest of jokes, opens us both up to form a deeper connection. Especially when I am a little sad, and am not getting the rightful way to express my thoughts, I use crying randomly in a game of role play, where I mention that I am the bad guy who is now hurt by the good guy, and am extremely sad. Such role plays help me vent out the pent up emotions and feelings without actually sharing thoughts, which eventually I forget after venting up. My son and I also create new stories and keep changing roles.
These playful exchanges, whether through laughter, pretend crying or co-creating stories become more than just fun, it becomes a safe outlet of emotions for both parent and child. And in those moments of imagination, something beautiful happens: healing begins. Because playfulness is that zone where failures, mistakes, or weaknesses are accepted, acknowledged and celebrated. There is tremendous room for trial and error, thereby easing out the pressure to perform. It is all about just playing or acting without the fear of failure or making mistakes.
As Playfull Parents, when we alter our perspective about mistakes into retakes, from rigidity to flexibility, all sorts of pressure eases out of one’s system. This in turn releases the undue stress or overthinking, leading to healing. When we are in an act of play or laughter, there is a burst of dopamine that enters the system. This also enhances blood circulation. The natural dopamine just transforms the energy into a bubbly one.
And perhaps one of the most powerful realizations is that we don’t have to rediscover playfulness alone. As we begin to embrace healing through play, vulnerability, and emotional openness, the presence of a supportive community can amplify that transformation. After all, healing isn’t meant to happen in isolation—it blossoms in connection. So keep reading to see what building a supportive community environment can do for you.
Building a Supportive Environment for Emotionally Expressive Fatherhood
Fatherhood is not meant to be a solo act. In spaces where openness is welcomed and playfulness is encouraged, fathers can unlearn old beliefs and lean into new ways of showing up, with honesty, creativity and heart. But, how exactly can a community support this evolution?
Well, for me, witnessing the interactions of other fathers ignited a desire within me to cultivate more playful and imaginative avenues for connecting with my children. Creating an environment where parenting obstacles could be openly and honestly discussed with other parents, and genuinely valuing their opinions unveiled novel understandings that significantly contributed to my development as a parent. It became clear that each parent embarks on this journey with a unique set of instincts and methodologies. Within the embrace of a nurturing and collaborative community, we gain the invaluable opportunity to glean wisdom from the diverse approaches employed by others.
This exchange of experiences empowers us to unearth inventive and practical resolutions for the commonplace yet often perplexing challenges that arise in the daily realities of raising children. Much like the experience of surmounting creative impasses in any endeavor, attentively observing the parenting styles of others or thoughtfully considering shared advice can introduce revitalizing viewpoints, ultimately smoothing the often-winding path of parenthood and fostering a greater sense of confidence and joy.
When we witness other fathers showing up with vulnerability, creativity, and emotional presence, it invites us to do the same. This shared space of learning and unlearning helps us not only connect with our children, but also redefine what it means to lead within our families.
And this brings us to something deeper. What happens when a father chooses emotional openness, not just in isolated moments, but as a way of being—at home, with his children, with his partner? What ripple effect does that create in the family system?
You see, when a father openly expresses his emotions—whether it’s joy, sadness, vulnerability, or empathy—he sets a powerful tone for the entire family. His emotional openness challenges outdated norms that equate masculinity with emotional restraint, thereby creating a home environment where feelings are seen as natural and valid rather than shameful or threatening. This not only encourages children to express their own emotions in healthy ways, but also fosters greater emotional intimacy with partners. It helps normalize difficult conversations, reduces emotional isolation, and increases trust across relationships. In essence, a father’s willingness to be emotionally transparent becomes a stabilizing force—modeling emotional intelligence, shaping healthier communication, and nurturing a more connected and resilient family system.
In a nutshell, tremendous and manifold impact. A father is a role model of all family members, including the spouse. When I stop sharing my emotions, as a sign of masculinity, my folks follow soon. One fine day, when I burst out, they all get zapped, and they resort to curbing their expressions. In order for this, it is very important for me to accept my emotions, and my tendencies and allow it to flow. I was raised by two completely opposite families.
One led by my paternal grandfather who was very strong, intelligent, but never really expressed himself at home, be it his emotions or thoughts. Instead, he would do that outside. In the long term, it created a great gap amongst the family members, in terms of communication and understanding. This gap continued to increase and even percolated in the 3rd generation. On the other hand, my maternal grandfather was strong, yet open about his feelings. He gave tremendous importance to his spouse, which created a potential for shared vision and shared responsibility of life. His children modelled him, and both the 2nd and 3rd generation are quite vocal about their opinion, and also allow others a safe space to express.
This is why emotional modeling isn’t just a moment, but it’s a practice. When we commit to daily rituals that honour expression, connection becomes part of the family rhythm.
Listening with attention and presence gives true meaning to the listening, and makes the speaker feel heard. Once the speaker feels heard, he/she feels satisfied and fulfilled, having his/her biggest emotional need met. A practice where each member gets to share about what he/she is going through and the rest listen, and turn by turn each member gets to share. The x factor in this sharing circle can be judgement free listening by each member. If each member can announce his/her emotion whenever required, that could be the icing on the cake.
These shared spaces, where feelings are welcomed rather than suppressed, not only heal but empower. Within such homes, the roles we’ve inherited, especially those tied to gender and parenting begin to evolve. And among the most profound shifts we witness is in the hearts of fathers which brings us to a powerful reimagining—one of the legacy of fatherhood. How? Let’s find out.
Reimagining the Legacy of Fatherhood
As fathers step into these emotionally safe spaces, something transformative happens—not just for their children, but for themselves. They begin to re-author their place in the family story, not as distant protectors but as fully present, emotionally engaged human beings.
Today’s fathers have a powerful opportunity to redefine masculinity by embracing open emotional expression. By modeling vulnerability, discussing feelings openly, and being emotionally present, they challenge outdated norms that equate masculinity with stoicism and suppression. This shift not only builds emotional literacy in their children but also breaks generational cycles of silence and shame.
Fathers who listen with empathy, show tenderness, and express a full range of emotions teach their children—regardless of gender—that strength includes vulnerability. In doing so, they leave behind a new emotional blueprint: one where masculinity is rooted in authenticity, connection, and compassion.
Yet redefining masculinity is only one part of this evolving legacy. As fathers cultivate emotional presence, another profound shift begins to unfold, one that reshapes how they care. Moving behind the traditional protector role, fathers are now called to embrace the nurturing dimension of fatherhood with equal pride and intention. This invites a deeper question—what shifts when fathers fully accept their role as emotional caregivers rather than just protectors?
I believe when fathers fully embrace their role as emotional caregivers—not just protectors—they transform the family dynamic and expand the definition of fatherhood itself. This shift fosters deeper bonds with their children, builds emotional resilience within the family, and models empathy as a masculine strength. Rather than seeing nurturing as secondary to providing or protecting, fathers who lead with compassion create safe, supportive environments where children feel seen, heard, and valued. In doing so, they not only enrich their relationships but also help raise a generation that views emotional caregiving as a shared human responsibility, not a gendered role.
As fathers lean into this nurturing role, an even more beautiful possibility emerges: the opportunity to experience the full joy of parenting, unburdened by outdated expectations of emotional restraint. When love is expressed openly and without reservation, parenting transforms from a duty into a dance of mutual discovery and connection.
Fathers who openly display love through words, affection, and emotional availability experience the greatest joys of parenthood. Unreservedly showing their feelings fosters authentic connections with their children, enabling them to be completely seen and loved.
This openness generates moments of deep intimacy, trust, and mutual understanding that transcend conventional fatherhood. By prioritizing love over emotional detachment, fathers discover the true wonder of parenting: a connection based on shared humanity, warmth, and unconditional acceptance, rather than just obligation.
So, in embracing their full emotional selves, fathers don’t just parent—they transform. They become living invitations for their children to grow up rooted in wholeness, connection, and love.
Now we’ve come to the conclusion. So let’s quickly recap.
Conclusion
The journey into the emotional side of fatherhood is one of profound growth, both for fathers and their children. By embracing vulnerability, redefining love in action, co-evolving emotionally, utilizing play as a language, building supportive communities, and reimagining the legacy of fatherhood, we open doors to deeper connections and lasting impacts.
It's not about being perfect, but about being present and authentic. This journey empowers fathers to not only transform themselves but also to create an environment where their children feel safe, seen, and loved. In embracing emotional openness, fathers unlock the true joy of parenting and leave behind a legacy of love and connection for generations to come.
Here are the key takeaways from this blog:
Welcoming Vulnerability as a Superpower: Breaking traditional molds of masculinity and embracing vulnerability can relieve pressure and create unexpected moments of closeness with children. Being honest about imperfections strengthens the father-child bond.
Beyond Provision — The Heart of Presence: True fatherly love goes beyond financial and physical provision. Emotional presence, trust in a child’s natural process, and expressing love through touch, words, and play are vital for a deep connection.
Learning from a Child’s Emotional Honesty: Fathers can learn much about themselves by observing their child’s raw, unfiltered emotional expressions. This observation can lead to self-reflection and insights into one's own childhood emotions, promoting personal growth.
Play as an Emotional Bridge Between Parent and Child: Shared play is a natural and joyful way for fathers to express affection and build emotional closeness. It disarms emotional barriers and fosters safety and belonging, often more effectively than verbal expressions of love.
Finding Strength in Community and Vulnerability: Connecting with other fathers in a supportive community allows for learning from diverse approaches and unlearning old beliefs. Sharing experiences and witnessing vulnerability encourages personal growth and confidence in parenting.
Leaving Behind a New Emotional Blueprint : By modeling vulnerability and discussing feelings openly, fathers redefine masculinity and leave behind a legacy of authenticity, connection, and compassion. They teach their children that strength includes emotional expression and nurture emotional literacy.
As I continue to create a childhood for my children rooted in holistic growth and joyful presence, I’ve felt called to share this journey more widely.
That’s why I’ve come together with four other unique authors to co-create a book Parenting with a Smile: A Journey into Playful Living. This book offers insights from different perspectives of homeschooling, schooling and unschooling. You can read this book for more such raw sharings on various aspects of parenting from each of us.
Thank you for reading this blog. All the best for your parenting journey. Feel free to like, comment and share this blog with fellow parents.
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